Breaking the “If Only” Syndrome

When we look at people today, you will find that most people are addicted to comfort.  Even if you look at cultures and socio-economic classes around the world, you will see that this is universally true.  The big difference between the first world and the third world is that most of us in the first world have the financial means to what, in our own minds, we think will make us comfortable.

Rarely does our pursuit of comfort make itself clearly visible.  Rather, it disguises itself in more seemingly altruistic disguises such as the pursuit of a passion, the establishment of a friendship or perhaps the opportunity to experience something new.

Now, obviously, these things are not inherently evil.  Often there is genuineness imbedded in all of these.  The danger comes when they are the shroud of an attempt at comfort.

I have a friend who is a lot like you and me.  He wants to accomplish things, but he wants to do it with as little work as possible.  The result of this is pure laziness.  When things weren’t panning out for him, he began to complain.  He would say things like, “I’m not happy here.  I need to be around people who inspire me to do what I want to do.”  So my friend moved halfway across the country and now, two years later my friend is still not doing what he wanted to be doing.  He’s still unhappy.  The only thing that changed is that he now lives in a different city.

This is a classic case of the “if only” syndrome.

The musician knowing they could write a hit record “if only I had that guitar.”  Or the filmmaker knowing they could create that Academy Award winning film “if only I lived in LA.”  Or the husband who thinks he could be a better one “if only we didn’t have such financial troubles.”

“If only I had…”

“If only I lived in…”

“If only I could…”

“If only he or she had done…”

“If only I knew…”

The bottom line is that in the pursuit of comfort, we try to change everything but ourselves to achieve it.

I think that’s why a lot of the people who I have heard say these things or begin to live them out have simultaneously turned away from God.  It’s much easier to blame everything else, but all the while, God is saying, “what needs to change is your heart, your life, your actions.”

The truth is that what we’re really looking for isn’t comfort.  That’s why there are so many unhappy millionaires and executives and rock stars and professors.  They’ve reached the pinnacle of their fields, and still haven’t resolved that unsettled pursuit of comfort.

What we’re really looking for is peace, and peace comes from only one place.  That is going to bed each night knowing that we’ve spent the day living out God’s dreams for our lives.

So, today, if you find yourself restless, root out the “if onlys” in your life.  Take responsibility for yourself and begin living the life you were made to live.

About wmarsau

Most of the people who visit this blog already know me so it is kind of pointless to try to describe my life in this short little blurb. What is the purpose of this blog is the question. Over the course of this last year I have been exposed to some amazing people and have made personal development an important focus of my life. Being successful, not by the world's standards, but by God's has become my main focus. Mainly, I want to work to develop myself as a person who is kinder, reaches out to help those in need, and truly makes a difference in this world. To this end I am constantly reading and am exposed to so many differnet things along the way. These have been amazing and it is helping me grow so much. Then I started to think, "Why am I being so selfish?" You need to share with others these amazing things you are learning and being exposed to. That is where this blog comes into play. As I am reading and experiencing things that are truly amazing and life changing, I will be posting them on this blog. Obviously, I will not be able to post everything in it's entirity, but I will be summarizing them and letting you know the source of the article or book they come from so you can check them out later if you wish. I want this blog to be a place where you can go to often and be inspired and leave here with a smile on your face. I will be covering all kinds of different topics dealing with success and personal development. Topics like taking action, relationships, living to your potential, reinventing yourself, finances, leadership, presenting, goal setting, time management, etc. I will also be occasionally including topics on cooking, music, and gardening because they are special interests of mine. As a little disclaimer, I have given my life to the Lord and he is #1 in my life. I am his servant and everything I do in life is for his glory. With that being said, religion influences all areas of my life. There will be references to God in this blog because I can't seperate God from this or any other area of my life. I want you to know that if you do not believe in God, that is fine. That is your choice. This blog is open to anyone who wants to better their life. I will not be trying to influence or pressure anyone into having a relationship with the Lord from this site. Please don't feel uncomfortable. You can just read the portions of the blog that you wish to. I am inviting you to go on a journey with me. We will learn together to be the kind of people we were designed to be. Anyone can make a difference in this world, but it starts%
This entry was posted in Accountability, Change, Decisions, Dreams/Goals, God, Inspirational, Leadership, Motivational, Opportunity, Purpose, Reinventing Yourself, Thoughts/Mindset and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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