Twenty Things We Should Say More Often (Part 22)

say 22

Today we are going to talk about a bonus thing to say on our list of things we should say more often.  Every great Top 20 list is even better if there is a 21st thing.

Let’s dance.

This may seem a little silly, but is it really?  Try to think back to when you were a little kid.  When you were really happy, you most-likely would just spontaneously dance.  It was cute and everyone probably clapped when you did.  Somewhere along the line, we have lost that.  Why?  Maybe we consider it to be undignified to just break down into a few dance moves, but why do we think that?  Who decided that?  I think dancing is awesome and to be honest, if I saw someone break into dance moves in public, I would think that was totally cool and that the person had a lot of guts.

I think that we try to keep our joy contained inside ourselves too much.  I think it is time that we start letting our joy shine a bit more.  I love watching flash mob clips on You Tube.  What is most interesting to me is the people who happen to be there and have no idea what is going on at first.  They just stare in amazement.  If you watch them closely though, many of them will start to move and even dance along with the others.  That is what makes the flash mobs so powerful and moving.

God created us to dance when we feel joy in our hearts.  It is man who has tried to stifle this instinct deep within ourselves.  It’s time to let that deep inner desire back out.  Let’s dance!  Who knows, if you are willing to dance, maybe someone else will join in.  When your joy pours out of you, it often lands on someone else and they will be swept up in the joyous moment themselves.

Our assignment this week is the hardest one yet.  It will be a challenge, especially if you are a really self-conscious person.  When you are feeling a great sense of joy in your heart, I challenge you to break out into a little dance jig.  You can do it in private to start with, but I really want you to try to do it in front of at least one other human being.  Keep it as spontaneous as possible and see what joy you can spread around.  It is impossible to be depressed while you are dancing.

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Twenty Things We Should Say More Often (Part 21)

say 21

Today we are going to talk about #1 on our list of things we should say more often.

Something nice.  If you can’t think of anything nice to say, you’re not thinking hard enough.

The world is full of people who try to tear other people down.  Don’t be one of those people.  Say something nice instead.

Many people say things that are mean or meant to tear someone down for many reasons.  Some do it to try to bring down another person so that they will look better.  It mostly comes from that person feeling insecure in themselves.  Sometimes someone is just having a bad day and they take it out on another person.  They figure if they are feeling crappy, they want another person to feel crappy too.  Some people say mean things without meaning to.  They just slip out before they realize they are saying it.

Choose to be different.  Choose to be a person who builds people up instead of tearing them down.  Choose to say nice things to people.  It goes back to the old saying your parents used to tell you as a kid, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything.”  There is a lot of truth to that.  If it is too hard for you to think of something nice to say to a person, you really would be better off not saying anything at all to that person.

Obviously, it is a lot easier to say nice things to people when you are having a good day.  It is when things seem to be really going bad for you that the challenge of saying nice things becomes hard.  My best advice would be to try to avoid just blurting out whatever is on your mind.  Take the time to think about what you are saying before you actually say it.  Ask yourself the question, “How would I feel if someone said that to me?”  If it would make you feel good and build you up then go ahead and say it.  If you would not like to hear it, then chances are that you would not like to hear it either.

The old saying, “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me” really isn’t true at all.  Our words have a great deal of power.  You can really do a lot of damage to a person if you say mean and negative things to them.  On the other side of the coin, you also have the power to build people up with your words.

Our assignment this week is to find at least three different people and really go out of your way and say something kind and uplifting to them.  Try to make one of these people be someone who seems to be having a bad day.  Make the choice to be a person who lifts people up instead of tearing them down.

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Twenty Things We Should Say More Often (Part 20)

say 20

Today we are going to talk about #2 on our list of things we should say more often.

Life is tough, but so are you.

Most of the time life can be pretty difficult.  It is very rare that the stars all line up and everything seems to be going our way.  Usually, things will go wrong.  During these times life can seem really tough.  When they do, we have to have the ability to tell ourselves that we are tougher and we will get through this tough time.

There are times when life will really knock the wind out of your sails.  It could be the death of a family member or close friend, a bad medical report, a major repair bill comes up that you can’t afford.  There can also be times where a lot of little things seem to go wrong and the little things compound and lead to a real sense of futility.

It is during these times that we have to find the ability within ourselves to get through them and not let life get the better of you.  If you have a relationship with God, this would be the perfect time to pray and let God take some of the burden off of you.  It is also a good idea to confide in a close friend or family member.  They can give advice, help you see things from a different perspective, and maybe take some of the load off of you.

As humans, we were meant to be in relationship with each other so when tough things come, it is not the time to crawl into a hole and try to isolate yourself from everyone.  When you do this, it can make the tough times seem even more overwhelming.

Our assignment this week is to remember that even though life can be tough, we are tough too so we should not let tough times defeat us.  Look to God and other people to help you when you begin to feel overwhelmed and let them help you out of your tough spot.  If everything is going absolutely great in your life right now, then find someone else who seems to be struggling and offer to help them.  We were meant to go through life together so lets not forget that when help is needed the very most.

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Twenty Things We Should Say More Often (Part 19)

say 19

Today we are going to talk about #3 on our list of things we should say more often.

AAAAAA!

There are some days when it seems like everything is going wrong.  Sometimes you want to just stop everything and scream out “AAAAAA!”  Well, maybe you should.  Maybe you need to find some secluded spot and just yell out in frustration or anger.  Maybe you have a pillow that you can do that into.  Sometimes it is a better idea to just let it out instead of letting it continue to build up inside of you.

You don’t want to lash out at someone else, so maybe it is better that you just get it out away from other people.  It can turn out really bad when you unleash on some poor person who happens to be there when you frustration from inside finally boils over.  Chances are that they will not have deserved it and they certainly will not have seen it coming.

It is OK to unleash pent-up anger and frustration, but we just need to be smart in how we do it.  Get off alone where you can get it out.  Another great release can be to go get a good workout in.  Doing something physical that gets your heart rate up can really help.

Our assignment this week is to find a healthy release for any pent-up anger or frustration that might be welling up inside of us.  It is important to let it out, but not on another person.  Let’s be mature about this and find positive ways to let go.  Don’t keep it inside or it will just continue to eat away at you.

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Twenty Things We Should Say More Often (Part 18)

say 18

Today we are going to talk about #4 on our list of things we should say more often.

I disagree with you, but I still like you as a person who is a human being and I will treat you like that because if I didn’t, it would make everything bad and that’s what lots of people do and it’s lame.  It’s OK to disagree, but don’t be mean.

Leave it to a kid to say something so spot on.  Sometimes I really think that kids really do know this the best.  Somehow, as we grow older, we can tend to lose this innate sense of right and wrong.  As adults, we can get so filled with pride and want to be right, that when someone disagrees with us, we tend to get mean and angry towards that person.  We should not do that.

The world is filled with different ideas and opinions.  It is what gives our world flavor.  Just because someone does not agree with us, it does not mean that they are wrong.  It just means that they have a different way of looking at things.

It is OK to disagree.  But when you disagree be nice about it.  Be respectful of the other person and their opinion.  Treat the person as an equal and don’t look down on them just because they don’t agree with them.

Our world would be a very boring place if everyone had the exact same thoughts.  New and different ideas have the ability to open our minds and broaden our scope of understanding.  But this can only happen if we are open to receiving the new ideas and opinions.  Be a person who is open and not closed-minded.

Our assignment this week is to react in a positive and uplifting manner when someone disagrees with something we have said or done.  Treat them with respect and show that you value their opinion.  You may even learn something in the process.

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Twenty Things We Should Say More Often (Part 17)

say 17

Today we are going to talk about #5 on our list of things we should say more often.

Fart sound

Sometimes you just to have fun with life.  Life can be very overwhelming at times and sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself and for others is to just laugh.  I understand that a fart sound my not make everyone laugh, but you are missing the point.  Insert whatever you do find funny here.

Sometimes we tend to get too serious about things.  We can take ourselves way too seriously.  Sometimes we get so focused on what is happening right now in this very moment, that we forget to see the big picture.  Most problems are not nearly as big as we think they are at the time when we are going through them.

The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.

EE Cummings

I really love this quote.  I really do believe that if you go through a whole day without laughing, it was a wasted day.  Laughter draws us together and makes us put life in perspective.  If laughter was not such a big deal, comedy movies and shows would not be so popular in our society.

Our assignment this week is to try to find a situation that could use some comic relief and then provide that comic relief.  Make someone who is having a hard time and seems to be bogged down by life laugh.  It can really help them out and it will make your day go better too.

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Twenty Things We Should Say More Often (Part 16)

say 16

Today we are going to talk about #6 on our list of things we should say more often.

Nothing.  Just listen.  Sometimes nothing is the best thing you can say.

Keith Whitley and later Allison Krause had it right when they sang, “You say it best, when you say nothing at all.”  I am a firm believer in the fact that God gave us two ears and one mouth because we should listen more than we speak.

People in our society tend to be scared to death of silence.  They do not like periods of time with nothing said so they sometimes talk just to talk.

If we know someone has a problem, we want to solve it, so we give them the best solution we know how.  Sometimes a person isn’t looking for a solution.  Sometimes they just want you to listen.

This happens a lot at funerals.  You know a person is hurting so you want to tell them something and you end up saying something dumb that might seem to be minimizing their loss.  Most people just want you to listen to them and then maybe just give them a hug.

We all need to get better at listening.  Listening to our spouse, our children, our family, our friends, even our enemies.  When we listen to them and don’t try to talk all the time, we are showing them that we care about them and what they are feeling.

We don’t have to have all the answers to be a great friend to them.  We don’t even have to understand what they are going through.  Sometimes we need to just be there for them and just listen

Our assignment this week is to find at least one person who seems to be down or out of sorts in some way.  Ask them what is wrong and then just shut up and listen.  Fight the urge to give them advice or try to sorry their problem.  Just listen to them and show that you care.

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